Thursday 31 July 2008

Just a couple days left

before we leave the cottage and head back to Waterloo, then home to Sweden on Tuesday.

So many thoughts are running through my head, memories, frustrations, sadness and, well, a whole lot of other stuff.

After 6 weeks in Canada I long for my own family- especially for my mum, I long for some space with my man and my children and I long for some time alone with my man - another time perhaps, another lifetime......

It is all down hill from here, the cleaning up, packing up, and then the packing to go home, the last minute things that need to be done, the good-byes, and the sadness from those who struggle most when we leave. Then the unpacking and the quietness of our little home. I have to deal with the car, a wasps nest and where to put everything once we get it unpacked. Then to make some phone calls to friends to try and pick up the pieces, pick up where we left of over 6 weeks earlier. Ty will highly stressed every inch of the way. Once at home he will want to work before he starts back at school, less than a week after we get home. I will have two kids to keep busy, to get back in to a routine, to help re-connect with their daily life. My work will have to wait.

I will take home all my "nice" clothes, nicely folded, as they were when I put them in the suitcase back in June. No get-away to Toronto, no day on our own in Elora, not even an evening meal on our own in some little restaurant. One day I will learn to get my expectations in line with my reality - and save myself a whole lot of heartache and frustration.

But until all that starts we have one more full day here at the cottage, here's hoping it is a nice one and I can put all my thoughts aside and enjoy it. I will really miss the cottage, we all will!

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